What do you want?

I have yet to really establish with passion and emotion where it is I would like to be now.  Everything I read about goals and change says you need to have some emotion and feeling behind what you are striving for and I need to work on that.  I want to be a lighter, stronger, faster woman and I get excited when I catch glimpses of my stronger lighter body but it isn't enough.  I need to want this.  I think about things like my desire to be lighter and my reflections after a boundless and strong run.  I know life is easier and more fun in a lighter body and it feels soooooo much better in a lighter body.  I just need to want this.  Come on, want it.  Love the idea of it and really believe you can do it. 

My story

At this moment I know that my current story of becoming the best version of me has hit a plateau. This is the point where I usually turn to a new story, but the climax has yet to be written. I can't stop now!  I have written many stories in my weight loss adventures and they usually end with something like... I lost my way, became complacent and watched the scales and waist circumference increase once again.  So the story so far…there was this 38 year old mum who knew it was time to do something about her ever expanding body (yet again).  The scales said 89.5kg and she knew she was NOT going to get to 90 kilos ever again.  Having tried and succeeded in many  weight loss challenges she knew she just needed to enrol in something and get focused.  She had always admired Michelle Bridges’ no bullshit attitude and decided to sign up to her 12 week body transformation challenge.  12 weeks later she had lost 11.5% of her body weight and saw 78.4kg (for a day). 

Yippee I was getting loads of comments and was feeling mighty chuffed at my efforts.  So that could be the end of the great story but if I end it there what happens next?   Usually it goes something like...  she continued to exercise and enjoy her body but slowly lets bad habits creep in and with it gram after gram sneaks into her butt and gut leaving her disheartened and body conscious yet again.

Well this is where, to tell you the truth, until this moment I had not really thought how the next bit of my story would go. Two months and a silly season have passed and I am still sitting pretty in my sub 80kg body.  Story is going well and I am excited. I look better than I have for a while but know it is time to get into gear and get to a healthy weight range.  The other day I ran 1km in 4 minutes 20, life is great.  I am loving my machine of a body and am inspired by it.  I am however a little bored with how the story is going because I am still guilt ridden over my love and lack of self control when it comes to my wine consumption.  I am in a perpetual cycle.  I get through another rather mundane day with the kids home for the holidays, don't achieve much, daydream and procrastinate and 5 times out of 7 finish the day guzzling down a bottle of wine.  I don't want this to be my story but it is but I would like to add a new and more interesting bits to it.  How can I make things interesting?????

 An interesting thing did happen the other day and I have been thinking it was a sign but I am ignoring it.  One afternoon when all was busy, I snuck down to the wine cupboard after vowing to be alcohol free on weekdays and got a bottle of sav blanc to chill.  As I came up the stairs there was this bizarre strike of lightning which gave out an almighty shriek, I

nearly wet my pants and my hubby came out saying he had witnessed a strike of lightening hit the road just outside our house.  The universe is talking to me but I am not listening.  So now how can I really make this story end???

One day, while sitting on her magic carpet a bird whispered in her ear...the mutterings were translated,  "I see your future and things look grim for you, all you need to do today to change it is leave the wine to the winos and things will start to become amazing."  I am choosing a less than amazing existence while partaking in problematic drinking and it is time to do something about it.  As you as my witness I am going to vow to no longer drink obsessively.  I am amazing and am urgently requiring more amazing things to happen, and if it is meant to be.....well it is up to me!  Go forth and conquer that wino inside you, put her to bed once and for all.  It is time!

2012 - Year of Clarity

I have now declared 2012 as the year of clarity.
 
1.  Clarity of thoughts as I consume less booze.
2.  Clarity in wee as i make healthier choices
3. Clarity in my workspace as I ensure better order
4. Clarity in my direction, more planning and structure in everyday life.

Good Luck to me :)