I am in between sizes now and I feel excited but I also have some demon inside me conspiring against me. "Drink that wine, eat that extra food, who cares you are an 80kg woman stay here, you like it here." This is where all your clothes fit and you are comfortable. Okay comfortablish. I soooo want to embrace smaller me but for some reason I have dropped the ball in the past three weeks and lost my momentum. The main culprit is my over consumption of wine and if I continue to do this I will steadily gain back the weight I have lost. WHAT AM I DOING? I really have to work on this wine issue. You know what I do now to try and feel okay about the wine drinking? Wake up and not eat breakfast and go for a run to run off what I have drunk last night! I do not want to be in this spiral. I hate waking up every morning feeling bad about drinking the night before, I hate it! It has a hold on me and I want to break free. I want to break free from the hold. Yes I do, I really do. What am I going to do? Well today is the first day of the rest of my life so I may as well start now. I am committed to eating clean today and only feeding myself noursihing food. I love you body and I want to treat you well.
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