Hooray I am FREE

Oh if you ever read my story from the beginning you will never have heard me write the way I am about to write.  I am finally FREE, I will never drink alcohol again and I am excited.  I have changed my whole attitude to it and I have no remorse.  I am not missing out I am loving life.  I love my teas and I love being a me I am proud to be.  I have lived for many years as a walking hypocrite and that has been so painful.  A walking contradiction.  I knew I did not have it together and would not be able to move forward until I extinguished my relationship with wine for good and it is now over I am a bit excited because I am really embracing this Never Drinking Again idea.  I really loved what I read on www.rational.org and it solidified what I have been wanting to do for ages...be free of the ugly hold I had on wine forever.  The Beast (my Boozy Brain) no longer walks with me and only sits in the shadows occasionally trying to convince me that I want to play with him but I am not paying him much attention.  This is what it has to be for me as I was painfully plagued with such guilt and torment for too long.  I am now the healthy fit person I have dreamed of being and no longer turning to the bottle for comfort.  I am feeling my feelings knowing that it really was not better seeking solace in the wine.  I just thought it was momentarily cos I am an instant gratification kind of girl.  The thing that signed the deal for me was the idea that I was allowing an animalistic, primitive part of my brain to rule my decisions (aka Boozy Brain or The Beast).  How pathetic.  I am far better than that so yes I have taken back my control and I am driving my "me" bus.  I hear another part of brain saying yeah yeah Kate its early days but I am not entertaining her either.  I am a much better me NOW and that is all that matters.