1. Because I thrive on routine and with a 12 week transformation plan all elements of my life improve not just health.
2. I want to see if eating/drinking clean and training hard would help me feel better.
3. I want to have a personal focus to assist me through the hard times when it comes to managing myself, my family, my job and my life.
So far the results have been questionable? I feel more tired than I have in ages, my muscles hurt pretty well ALL the time so everything is an effort and following the eating plan and curbing my urges to snack on peanut butter, sultanas, cheese and rice crackers has proved very trying. You should have seen me try and make the evening meal of Lamb Balls and Tabouli. tonight, it took me almost 2 hours. It was well worth it but I must admit I am sitting here feeling really empty and starving for something else. So off I go to see if that "herbal tea" will help. Oh Geez let me tell you this 12 week thing is bugging me. I am hungry, tired, and miserable. At least before I could feel the temporary satisfaction of wine o'clock. Now I find my self counting 10 far too many times and wishing I was somewhere else. Wine used to be such a good friend. I don't miss the guilt, extra tummy flab and foggy head that came with it but at the moment I am struggling to amp on the benefits. I know that this may have something to do with the fact that I am a bit of a "moody" person and these issues are par for my course these days but I am annoyed with the icky feeling I have at the moment.
I have a few questions that need addressing.
1. Why do we have to endure pain to feel success?
2. Why are there so many temptations in life that most people enjoy and never feel guilty about?
3. Why am I any better for flexing that Willpower muscle?
I think what I need to do is remember I am changing a few things here and at times things are going to be difficult. Ideally lets think what would I be doing everyday to be the person I so optimally need to be.
I would awake at 5am and start the day with 15 minutes of meditation, followed by a ice cold water with the juice of half a lemon. I would then spend another 15 - 30 minutes practising whatever yoga my body called for that day. The next step would be to step out and do my morning workout - 1 hour hardcore something, weights, run or combination. I am back home, its 7:15, I prepare my deliciously wholesome breakfast of ricotta cheese and something on toast and wash down with the first of many green teas I'll consume that day. Its not even 7:30, the washing is on and the children are just rousing. Their breakfast is prepared and awaiting their enthusiastic taste buds. Lunch is then prepared for them as I calmly tidy and potter whilst the kids get ready for school. I am ready for the next phase of the day which is changeable, depending on the day. Lets imagine it is tomorrow and I am home for the day. The next thing I will do is consult the "To do" list I diligently wrote the day before and set about getting as many tasks complete as I can. I will probably enjoy a coffee in the midst of this and then enjoy a green tea or two and yoghurt before lunch which will be something delightful and only 300 calories in value.
I could go on but at this stage all I can say is okay, okay so I am not yet here. I guess it is something to strive for but I can't even imagine being this cool.
Tomorrow I will wake at 4:30 and inhale a coffee while I stumble around the house searching for all my running gear, I may consume a piece of my beloved peanut butter and honey on toast before setting off to a speed training running session at St Lucia that starts at 5:30am. I will zoom home and be back by about 6:50 and will proceed to fumble through the lunch boxes, clothes baskets and the pantry to sort the kids out before escorting them to school and walking the dog. It will be 9am and I will then sit down and attempt to write a to do list before getting side tracked on some frivolous task and then I will find myself reading forums and navel gazing until my tummy rumble and I fill it with something like far too much oats muesli. Need I go on? This is good but it is not good enough for me and does not align with being in harmony with me.
I have to get my act together. Yes there are few things that need sorting out and the most important is being organised and this is also one of my most challenging The 12 week challenge is going to help me with this but in the end it is up to me.
Why am I doing this you ask?
Because things need to change and I need to change them. Why? I would like to do things more harmoniously and feel well and proud.
You can do 20 whole grain rice crackers for only 132 calories. I think have such a clear vision of how you want your future day to run is pretty organised. Don't beat yourself up too much. You are making an effort which is more than most. :-)
ReplyDeleteThanks for taking the time to comment. Yes, 20 crackers. If only I could stick to that limit in a day. I usually eat the whole packet which is about 350 calories. But if that is the worse thing I do, then so be it. I used to eat a whole packet of Milky Ways so way better than that.
ReplyDeleteI love your blog, so honest and I can so relate. I was 115kg after the birth of my second child and found everything hard. I really admire your "no Bull**&" approach. Take it easy and listen to your body. You need to remember that stress and tiredness do not help you lose weight. Believe me that was the biggest issue for me. You are doing great.
Cheers